Fanart for a friend- I need PROFESSIONAL criticism, please?

[The Sonic God]

Take a look at this pic:

http://www.ultimategamers.org/temp/kristynlioness.jpg

Sorry to say, but this is my best self-ranked trade pic I have done for someone, combining my own art signature, with some natural design, looking at pictures of real lions, and some TLK design. I would like some criticism on how the pic could be improved, and what you like about it.

This is a picture of KristynLioness, bathing herself in the moonlight on the african savannah, near Pride Rock.

(The background is NOT the focus of this pic, just the lion.)

I'd like any constructive criticism you have, as most of you here are muchly experienced artists.

(Sorry that I could not post this in Russian.)

[Protv Scar]

Well...
1) I don't see hind legs... maybe she stretched them?
2) Maybe it will be better if draw her cheek.
3) I think she's a little thick, but I don't know it may be a feature of chatacter.
4) There's must be chest and ear is too small.

That's all in fact
And don't be in offence, okay?

[The Sonic God]

1) I don't see hind legs... maybe she stretched them?
2) Maybe it will be better if draw her cheek.
3) I think she's a little thick, but I don't know it may be a feature of chatacter.
4) There's must be chest and ear is too small.

1) Hind legs are hidden from view, on the opposite side of her body. She is lying on her side.
2) Hmm?
3) The thickness is based off of the lion picture I studied. Probably a mistake. She is supposed to be half-panther, half-lion.
4) Her left ear (right side) is bent back a little bit. Due to some improper detail and proportion errors, this was the best I could get it without practice. Her front side, she is lying on her chest, and her backside, her back paws are turned away.

The error I noticed right off the bat is the right arm (away), and it's maladjusted. Also, lacking any spinal lines, you can't tell her body is half bent.

I won't rank my own work, but what do you think? On a scale of 1-10, 10 being the best.
[/quote]

[Athari]

Actually, I'm not professional; I just learn to draw, but IMHO:

• Fingers are too small.
• Shoulders are too linear (they have triangular projection).
• There's no line separating belly.
• Left ear looks quite strange; maybe you should turn it a bit.
• Jaw seems like placed on her neck, maybe it's too stretched.
• As Protv Scar said, you should draw line under her cheek.
• Almost all lines look like drawn by ruler and compasses (not because of legibleness, but form).

PS. Sorry for my bad English, my native language is C++.

[The Sonic God]

That was basically restating what Pilate said.

Is there anything you like about it?

[Athari]

That was basically restating what Pilate said.

Er... I don't think so. I've repeated points about cheek and ear, but everything else is mine, at least I think so.

Is there anything you like about it?

Sorry, I don't want to lie. My mark is 3-4. Maybe I'm wrong, but I like ideal works or near to ideal. And I prefer colored pictures, not sketches. You can always correct errors. Have a look at this picture, it may help you: panther or it's HiRes.

All your pictures have the same mistake. Especially these lines are not linear:

The same with other lines. Look at your own arms; you'll notice that there's no straight lines. The same with lions. Illegibility can't help to hide mistakes.

[ForumAdmin]

you must learn, how the bones of felines attached to each other and how they can move. ...i think the mouth is opened too wide. left ear is too small..

[The Sonic God]

I don't get much practice, so this is a big help. Thanks everyone.

The same mistakes that were pointed our I already knew. However, if someone would like to see the lion pic I based it on, just ask.

The "small ear" was actually supposed to be drawn in a way that the ear is turned back toward her head.

The jaw was misproportioned because the photo detail was a strange shot. That was very hard to capture.

However, I also noticed mistakes in other's artwork here. My belief is that you need a second set of eyes to judge based on experience.

[Protv Scar]

To The Sonic God: I made edition of your pic, it shows how would I draw the same forms (red outline). (it's MY version, don't criticize I know it's not ideal )
http://pilate.fromru.com/kristynlioness.jpg
I'll be glad if it helps you.

About rating picture: Unlike Athari, I could like sketch even more than coloured picture, but it must be a really good one.
Rate of this pic, my mind, is ~4-5 of 10. IMHO.

[Athari]

The same mistakes that were pointed our I already knew.

I don't undestand. If you know mistakes, why do you do them?

Unlike Athari, I could like sketch even more than coloured picture, but it must be a really good one.

Unlike? I didn't mean that I don't like sketches. I see good sketches quite rarely, usually artists color best pictures. And after coloring I like them more.

[Protv Scar]

Уж мне-то мог бы по-русски написать
Некоторые скетчи так впечатываются в мозги...
http://fanart.lionking.org/imgarchive/F ... /Dein2.jpg - вот этот скетч меня просто поразил своей простотой и одновременно - он же живой, это так рулезно...
вот я так не умею